Crazy People Petition Whitehouse for Skyrim Ban

At Kotaku there was a small, but very funny article about a petition against Skyrim. This isn't the run of the mill "we need a patch, there are issues with the game" fan complaints, this is full on "round up every copy and burn them" style. That's a little intense don't you think, to you know, destroy any mention of a game that sells millions? Well, maybe that's because the authors are a little out of left-field. Here is the petition in it's amazing original form, straight from Kotaku:

WE PETITION THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION TO:
Immediately Ban the Deadly Videogame Known as "SkyRim" for The Safety of America's Youths.
Whereas videogaming has proven to cause social, ethical and health problems in people of all ages,

Whereas sexual perversion and homosexuality are threatening to destroy the Christian foundations on which this nation was built,

Whereas a new video game has just been created that far exceeds any others in the psychological and spiritual damage it does to teens,

We, the American people, today ask you,

1) To enact an immediate ban on the videogame known as "SkyRim" produced by Blizzard Entertainment.

2) To seize and destroy all copies already in public hands and erase its presence on the internet.

3) To prosecute the players of "SkyRim" to the fullest extent of the law.

4) To create a national database of videogame avatars and "screen names" so that teenagers can be better monitored.

Good chance it's a joke, but hey their are crazy enough people in the world that this could be legit. It also felt like a good time to poke some fun rather than my usual commentary on the happenings in the videogame industry. Mainly this was an excuse to bust out a Buddy Jesus pic, but I digress, let's look at everything wrong here.

1.) They call it "SkyRim"

First off, it's "Skyrim". It's the name of a country in the continent of Tamriel located on the planet Nirn in the Elder Scrolls Universe. It's not two words, it's not like they named the place "Sky Rim Job" or something (considering they allege "sexual perversion and homosexuality" is a big part of this game). So credibility is getting questioned here.

2.) "Whereas sexual perversion and homosexuality are threatening to destroy the Christian foundations on which this nation was built"

You mean Protestant?

3.) "To enact an immediate ban on the videogame known as "SkyRim" produced by Blizzard Entertainment."

Really? I mean c'mon, I can understand messing up the whole history of america and the pilgrims deal, but it says "Bethesda" right on the damn box.

4.) To seize and destroy all copies already in public hands and erase its presence on the internet."

You ever hear of 4chan or anonymous? Good luck with that one.

5.) "To prosecute the players of "SkyRim" to the fullest extent of the law."

I didn't know that 1000 bounty in each of the 9 holds was going to catch up to me in real life....

So, in conclusion, this whole thing is ridiculous. Yes, I have logged over 90 hours on Skyrim but I'm not going on shooting sprees, acting homosexual, or trying to burn down the christian church and none of my friends are so I think we are going to be fine. I think everyone else thinks it is a joke too when they get digital signatures on the petition from people with Skyrim reference names like "Dova K", "Fus Roh Dah", "Lusty Argonian M", "Balgruuf T", and "Tiber S". All in all, people just need to relax on videogames. Media sources like Fox feeding us awful information from people like Jack Thompson over recent years has given a bad image to games. There is nothing better or worse on television or a movie that you will find in a game and the rating in systems in place are there for a reason. No game is going to cause someone to do ridiculous things unless a careless adult can't read that a game like  Skyrim contains blood and violence and gives it to an impressionable person like a 5 year old or an unmedicated schizophrenic. So what do you guys think? This is a hilarious petition by crazy people, that you actually agree with them, or that this joke does point toward the issues of game content and the audience that they are meant for with the current ESRB rating system? Sound off below!